I have much to catch You up on.
But let me make something clear, because i haven't made an entry in a
while, doesn't mean i haven't been having my God time. I got a new
journal. And don't You love the feeling of a crisp new notebook for You
to write down anything that You fancy? To write down all You desire &
hope & pray for? All that God wants You to be and strive for?
Anyways. Back to the point.
Since my last entry, a crazy fire to study Intelligent Design has
consumed me. At first, it made me doubt. Reading about evolution & the
crazy depths of science that's threaded into it frightened me. Which, i
think, led to my distance from the Lord in my last entries.
But then i started learning about the intensity of God's power & works
when he breathed everything into existence.
If You are one who is doubting, take comfort in this;
Why do You think the universe is created just perfect for us?
The earth is the perfect distance from the Sun to live. It were 5%
closer, the earth's water would evaporate & we would die. If it were 20%
further, the water would freeze & we would die.
And the earth is on an axis to provide a perfect amount of sunlight to
sustain life.
And we are just one of 9(8?) planets in our solar system. There's about
a few million stars in our galaxy. And then there's thousands more
galaxies than ours & then the planets surrounding those stars. None of
which provide the perfectness atmosphere for there to be life on those
planets.
The British mathematician Roger Penrose conducted a study of the
probability of a universe capable of sustaining life occurring by chance
and found the odds to be 1 in 10 to the 10th power to the 123 power.
Thats 1/10^10^^123.
That is a mind-boggling number. According to probability theory, odds of
1 in 10^50 represents "Zero Probability." But Dr. Penrose's calculations
place the odds of life emerging as Darwin Described it as more than a
trillion trillion trillion times less likely than Zero.
And that's just one example of why evolution isn't a reliable theory. I
didn't even mention the tons of animals that defy evolution like
Giraffes(sp? :/) & a tiny half inch beetle in the rain forest!
:)
I. LOVE. THAT.
Take comfort in THAT my friends. Despite what arrogant, mean &
evolutionary atheists say, Creationism is logical, intelligent, smart &
true.
My new found fascination in this issue has earned me many heated
discussions & conversations with a lot of name calling, insults & harsh
comments. All of which have rolled off my back like no big deal. Until
they started coming from my brother.
I asked him what were to happen if he were wrong about evolution? He'd
go to hell. He then got furious about how Christianity wants us to live
in fear of hell & God. He and others then turned that into "i believe in
God just to get into heaven"? Uhno.
I believe in my King because He has done so much for me. Everything from
having a wonderful family, a perfect father, saving my dad from
suffering, taking away my loneliness, fears & sins, and giving me peace
is all situations. I am so thankful for all that has happened in my
life, and the best way i can think of returning the favor to my heavenly
Prince is by devoting my life to serve Him.
I'm not wasting my time praying, meditating & giving my money. I give my
time & money to widows and orphans in the world, wanting them to have
all that unbroken families have. The time i spend praying and hoping for
my mom, brother, sister, friends to have peace and joy and love in their
lives? That's not wasting my time in my eyes. I enjoy hoping for the
best for everyone that i love. I spend my time wisely serving, praying,
loving & joyfully. All in God's beautiful name.
i'm not trying to "scare the hell" out of You. I want the best for You,
and i want You to know that. I live in the Fear of God because it scares
me how incredible He is. How He created everything. It brings me to a
place of awe and wonder and i just can't get enough of it. I don't know
all the answers to why we Christ followers need to live in the Fear of
God, but i am looking and reading and researching about it.
Which leaves me with where i am now digging into this - why must we live
in the Fear of God? Why does God use fear as a motivation to believe in
Him?
If You have any comments or possible answers, please leave a comment or
text or call me! <3
Much more than just that little bit on intrege(sp?) has happened in my
life recently.
I never thought i'd be here again with a boy. Not THERE i like was with
the guy i wrote about before. But there's a little flame growing in my
love life.
But this is different.
We've had the longest friendship. Since 8th grade. His family LOVES me.
My mom LOVES him. My friends approve. His friends approve. My mentor
approves (so far...). All great, right?
Wrong.
I want this to be different than anything i've ever experienced with a
boy. Nothing like what happened with me and T**** or me and A***** or me
and D**** (ESPECIALLY ME AND HIM).
I want this relationship to be completely pure, honest & innocent. I
want any & everything we say & do honor Jesus & be in His beautiful
name. We're not kissing. I don't want to kiss til my wedding day.
I feel the Lords hand on this & with Him with us, then we can make this
right & beautiful.
I want to look back at everything that happened with fondness & without
regret - whether got married or not.
I think i've said more than i should, Blog. So, let's not wait so long
to talk.
Love,
Lea <3
